Its definitely not easy waking up everyday not knowing what my life is going to be like for the next few months. I tried to imagine the two different options, Surgery or more chemo then surgery. In my head, the best outcome of our meeting tuesday would be surgery, but i know thats not what i should be hoping for. If the chemo is working well, i will continue with chemo for another 2 months, and then go into surgery. Continuing with chemo would mean i recover 2 months later then i would have without it, but the tumour would be smaller for surgery. So there are some positives and negatives to both, but technically it is better if the chemo is working and i can continue.
Although its hard not knowing whats next, i have really been enjoying the last few days because i have been feeling so good. Im also excited for tomorrow! we are having some of our friends over and a few of us are going to do the full head shave! Pretty excited, but also pretty nervous to finally have a fully bald head. I never imagined I would be shaving my head at 17, but its an adventure, gotta embrace it.
“Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. it means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.”
Was just thinking about you. Have fun w/ the shaving party. You are doing great despite what’s been thrown at you. xoxo