Day 10- Missing my old day to day

My friends came in at lunch as usual, and caught me up on the latest news at school. And for the first time ever, I really missed my old day to day schedule, especially school and skating.  It wasn’t just the social side to school either; I really missed the feeling of accomplishment, and structure. My hospital days did not have much structure, and there want a whole lot to accomplish other then eating my whole plate of food or going on a short walk. A normal weekday for me before I would sick would be packed from 6am to 10pm, days filled with the desire to improve myself and get closer to reaching my goals. Now I lay in a bed for about 23 ½ hours of the day, it’s really hard to adapt to such a drastic change, and feel like there is nothing I can do about it.

I have started to figure out that there are ways I will be getting that sense of accomplishment, and I will have goals to reach, it will just be in a different way then I had ever imagined. I’m going to be starting treatment at some point, and we will have checkpoints to see if the treatment is working. I guess those check points will kind of be replacing skating competitions for a while. Like a skating competition I will need to be in the game physically and mentally prior to and during the specific date.  From what I’ve heard and read about, half the battle of beating cancer is mental. I have learned how to prepare mentally for skating competitions, so I know that I will be able to give 150% mentally and physically to eliminate this tumour. I know I can beat this, its just a matter of time.